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Story Module

Lesson 3.6 - Connecting Your Story

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Lesson 3.6 - Connecting Your Story | Click To Read More . . .

Hi, I'm Jon Gunzel and welcome to the next lesson in the Stories to Success System.  In this lesson we are going to learn the subtle art that allows us to convert a complete stranger into a new friend into a hot lead in two minutes or less. 

In fact, you'll be able to turn a total stranger into a raving fan who wants your product before you even know their name. . .

{S2S Splash Intro}

I'm going to talk to the shy people in the group for a minute here.  All you outgoing, "I can make friends anywhere types" can listen in for tips and clues, too though, ok? 

I am an introvert!  That's right, the big, strong, guy who's in all the ads and videos, who speaks on stages in front of hundreds of people.  Me.  Jon Gunzel.  I really am a pretty shy person.  In taking the Jung Personality tests, I always show up as the rarest of rare INTJ or INFJ.  

It's true.  For most of my life, I was fine listening to other people's conversations, being a fly on the wall and a spectator at social events.  There's only one problem with all that.  Being shy just doesn't pay the bills. 

No matter how you slice it, there is no way to hide the light of your candle under a basket and still be able to be valuable enough for people to want to exchange money with you. 

Now maybe there are a few people who figured it out, but I've seen it time and time again, the person who refuses to confront their shyness, also refuses to embrace their true value to the world.

You see, while being shy might seem like it protects us, it really robs our ideal clients of our wisdom and leaves a whole lot of money on the table at the same time.

You see, money follows the laws of attention.  You will attract as much money in your life as you attract PRO-SURVIVAL attention.  That means if you can get and hold your ideal client's attention and show them how you can help them survive, they will want to exchange money with you to get the help they need.

To me, money is only the measurement of how many people I've helped.  Sure it's nice to have lots of money, but the reason I work so hard is to help other people get the success in their own lives.  Having a lot of money allows me to help more people. It's as simple as that.

So what's the solution here?  I'm not going to tell you that you have to be an extrovert.  Instead, let's use the strengths of an introvert, COMBINED with some great techniques extroverts use to rev up our communications and start an inflow of amazing relationships.  Sounds good, right?

And for our extroverts out there, you will greatly increase your ability to build strong relationships if you use these techniques, too. 

So just like we have to do in any situation where we have a change to turn a stranger into a friend, let's just JUMP IN and make this happen.

Look, most people are slow to go start up a conversation with a stranger.  So we are automatically at an advantage if we become a powerful conversation starter, right?  But wait, I'm an introvert.  Why would I be the one to start a conversation.

I'll tell you why.  If we start the conversation, we are automatically in control instead of being a victim.  I like that so much better than standing around waiting for someone to pounce on ME. 

So here's what we do.  Whether I'm at the pool, the park, the airport or a big event, I'm aware of the other people around me. 

Since we've done an incredible job of researching our Ideal Client, we should be able to pretty much spot any potential candidates in any room we're in.  As soon as I spot someone who might fit the bill, I use one of two techniques.

I either quickly notice something about the person I can sincerely compliment them on (shouldn't be hard if they look like your ideal client)


I find something we have in common and ask a question about it.

Then I just walk right up and start talking. 

It works like this.  I was sitting in the airport in Tampa, Florida after spending almost a month in Clearwater.  I was tired, traveling by myself and looking forward to getting back to my family in Hollywood where we were living at the time. 

When I got to the gate, I could have just picked a chair away from everyone else.  Instead I just stood there for a minute and looked around at the other people in the area.   I asked myself, if I was Joe (my ideal client) where would I be right now?

Sure enough, a few seconds later I spotted a man in a Yosemite National Park shirt sitting by himself.  He was talking on his phone and telling his wife he would be home in a couple hours. 

I sat down across from him and spent a few moments arranging my things.  As soon as he was off the phone, I smiled at him and said, "Yosemite, huh? One of my favorite places on the planet."  He smiled a huge smile and said, "Oh, yeah!  That's my favorite place, too!"  It was the perfect application of the "find something in common technique and the door to conversation was blown wide open.

Then what?

Well, here's where the next introvert strength comes in.  I ask a TON of questions.  See, if I'm asking questions that means my new friend has to do all the talking and I can just sit and listen. Pretty cool, right?  It gets better.

While I'm listening to my new friend talk, I'm really LISTENING.  I'm gathering data he tells me and keeping mental notes (don't write notes, it just looks weird). 

It goes like this.

After opening the door with a compliment or something in common, I ask a related question.

In the airport example, it went like this.   "When was the last time you were there?"  Now he really started to open up.  "On our summer vacation last year.  I took my wife and kids and we spent the whole month of June camping up there. "

Oh man! How much info did he just give me?  He's married, has kids who are in school, has enough money saved to be able to take a month off and likes the outdoors.  He's definitely a potential ideal client. 

Next I asked, "Wow, a whole month off?  You must have a great boss, what do you do for a living?"

See how I took a piece of the info he already gave me and repeated it, then turned it into a question?  That's an easy way to continue a conversation and maintain control.  People LOVE to talk about themselves whether they would admit it or not.

Back to our conversation, he answered, "Well, I work for a software company in L.A, but I really don't like my job that much.  That's why I try to get out of there as often as I can.  What do you do?"

BINGO!  Ideal Client status confirmed!  And he gave me permission to tell him what I do AND we're barely 30 seconds into the conversation AND HE's done almost all the talking!

Now, I'm on the spot though.  He wants me to talk.  Time to transition to our 60 second story!

Here's the secret sauce on how to make the transition. 

I call it the, "Well you know how" question.  It goes like this,  "Well you know how some people work their entire lives in a job they hate only to find out their entire life passed them by while they were busy trying to make money?  Yeah, I prevent that from happening." 

Done right, the Well You Know How question gets our ideal client to ask, "How do you do that?"

I always have 3-4 Well You Know How questions so I can adapt them to any conversation.

Back at the airport, it went like this.  I said, "Well, you know how some people get stuck working a job they're good at, but can't stand being stuck at a desk?  Yeah, I set people free from that."

Just like clockwork, he asked, "how the heck do you do that?"

Again, he gave me perfect permission to go further into my story.

Now for the next step.  Precision power statement.  For review, mine is, "I help people capitalize on their skills and experience so they can build a flourishing lifestyle friendly business."

This is where we get to custom fit our statement right to our client.  See he's already told me what he does, so instead of saying, "I help people . . ." 

I said, "Well, I help guys who are stuck in jobs they hate capitalize on their skills and expertise so they can build a lifestyle family business and spend more time in the outdoors with their families."

His jaw dropped to the floor, but I didn't even slow down.  We're 60 seconds into our conversation.

Straight into my 60 second story. 

"You see, back when I was in high school, I broke my neck . . ."  you can review lesson #5 in this module if you want to hear the rest."

By the end of the story, he was asking how he could get more information and how it all worked.

I said, we'll first off, I'm Jon Gunzel, what's your name?

See, we had the entire conversation in less than two minutes and I didn't learn his name until after the story was over.  Pretty fun, right?

So there you have it.  An easy technique to turn a complete stranger into a raving fan who wants to buy your product in under 2 minutes even before you know their name. 

Now that's an idea situation and believe it or not, most of my conversations go that way, especially with after a little practice.

So, your action steps for this lesson are:

#1 Do whatever it takes to make the DECISION, "I am going to be the one who starts and controls conversations everywhere you go."  Write it on a notecard and carry it in your pocket.

#2  Memorize the two techniques for starting conversations.  Compliment, or find something in common and practice it on EVERYONE you meet!  (This one technique will make you more friends than you can imagine)

#3 Download and complete the "Well have you ever . . ." worksheet.  Be sure to come up with 3 or 4 different questions and start working them into your conversation.

#4  The most effective way to practice this is just like you saw me do it in this lesson.  Take out a sheet of paper or type it on our computer and walk through an imaginary 2 minute conversation.  Do this as many times as it take to get super comfortable.  The more you practice, the easier it will be for you to adjust on the fly and have an amazing conversation.

Remember there are no "Naturals" at this.  NOBODY IS A PROTÉGÉ.  We all have to work to fine tune our message and practice until we get good at it. 

Finally, #5 Create a new page in Microsoft OneNote and make a bunch of notes for yourself to review any time you are in a situation where you can start a conversation.  It will help to know they're there and to review them as often as possible.

You can do it and now you have the behind the scenes information to do it better than most.

Wow!  You've complete the Story Module and you are becoming a very powerful communicator who knows your Ideal Client and How to Connect them to your product.  Congratulations and Great Job!

In the next module we will learn how and why we will build an amazing brand and CAPTURE all the attention we're getting from our new clients. 

It's really starting to come together now.  Now, go master these steps and we'll see you in the next lesson!

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